Out of the Skids and Into The Win Part II

Dash had been the first to cross the victory line at the Karl’s Jr. Motor Speedway and now he knew he would be the first cross the victory line into Madeline’s entry to womanhood. Her sweet inboard cylinder would finally be home to his outboard drive shaft. Ever since he saw her in Roy’s office all those years ago he knew he had to have her. Her face was that of an Angel that he had seen in his “My First Illustrated Bible” (which he still took with him on races). But she had been out his class, out of his league, above his station, too big for her britches, a uptown girl who never had a backstreet guy, bet her momma never told her why etc. etc. He thought he would be stuck to cheap daydream fantasies of her and even cheaper prostitutes that kinda looked like her if he was drunk enough and they were wearing that special dress that he stole from her closet. But now the playing field had been leveled and Dash had his shot and he wasn’t about to blow it.

They had agreed to have their rendezvous in the team’s service center. When he got there the lights were almost completely dimmed. The only reason Dash could get around was because he knew the shop like a place you’ve been to several times before and incidentally memorized the layout of it. Taylor Swift was playing softly in the background. Dash made it to the team’s sole Harley Davidson upholstered bar stool where he sat down and waited for the magic to happen.

Suddenly he felt a chill run down his spine as the shop’s two industrial service fans turned on at full blast. Then a familiar voice behind him whispered, “I always wanted you to be my first Dash. And I always wanted it to be just like this”

As Dash began to turn around he got a sharp punch in the kidney’s and Madeline’s hushed voice said “Shhh. You’ll get all of what you have coming to you in just a moment. Just let me slip on something more appropriate”

“This is going to be some night,” thought Dash as he recovered from the jab and began unbuckling his pants. The anticipation was just brimming out of him like fryer full of Twinkies. He had thought of nothing but his moment since Madeline had pulled him over before the big race and promised herself to him if he came out on top.

Suddenly the soothing teenage angst change to an ear numbing mix of death metal and Bob Costas reading Winter Olympic figure skating results. Dash wasn’t sure why, but his seemed to turn him on even more than his previous expectations for the evening. The mixture of Cannibal Corpse and the melodic, drumming voice of Mr. Costas just slipped into his ear like a 4 wheeler through his Uncle Frank’s cow pasture.

It was at this point that a high powered strobe light began going off at regular intervals (as strobe lights are wont to do). Dash was turned around and there was Madeline in a 1984 Louisiana World Exhibition T-shirt, a leather trench coat, and nothing else. In her hands were a bright red ballgag, a small whip, and a half empty jar of Jiff. By the look on her face, Dash knew she meant business. By the look on his, she knew she might have a problem.

“I thought we would go slow to start with.” She said “This being my first time, it might take me a little while to figure out what I’m doing”

“Don’t worry,” said Dash. “This isn’t my first rodeo. As long as we use a safe word, we should be okay.”

Madeline smiled “The safety word is Earnhart, by the way” she said as she slowly moved her figures up Dash’s face. “Oh, and I don’t remember giving you permission to take your clothes off” And with that she kicked the chair out from under Dash and proceed to go to town on our hero like a red headed stepchild on Easter Sunday.

For many years to come Dash would never say he knew true love like he knew that night. Nor would he be able to go to the bathroom quite the same way ever again.